Thursday, September 22, 2011

Interview With Jackson Bennett, A Vampire

Some of you may think that this is a silly post and it is. It's very silly. However, the more I write about Jackson Bennett and his pursuing of the depressed and quite silly Amalia Thomas, the more I love him. Not like, love. So, to get to know my character, Jackson Bennett, I'm conducting a make believe interview with him so that I might learn a little bit more about the character I'm writing about. 


And for those of you from Moody's, no, Mr. Bennett doesn't sparkle, nor has he ever sparkled. He has, however, been enchanted by a witch a time or two...

Let us begin...

ME:  So, Jackson...tell me where you were born?

Jackson:  I was born in 1510 in a small place just on the Welsh border.

ME: Ooooh, so you lived through Henry the Eighth's reign?

Jackson: *Rolls his eyes*... Yes, I did. *Mutters under his breath*... Pompous bastard....

ME: Why did you call him a pompous bastard?

Jackson: Because he was. Can we get on with it? *Checks watch*

ME: Erm, uh, okay. Next question. What was your life before you were a vampire like?

Jackson:  Very boring.

ME: What of your parents? Siblings?

Jackson: My father was executed...thanks to King Henry the Horrible, and my mother died of the plague right after I was born.

ME: Oh, how horrible! I'm so sorry!

Jackson: *sighs*

ME: Did you ever visit Henry's court?

Jackson: Unfortunately, yes. I was there a lot. When I was about sixteen I was sent to court to serve and it was horrible. Between stupid, stuffy Wolsey parading around like he owned the place and that damned ignorant fool, that Thomas Boleyn...Parading his daughters around the way he did, it's a wonder he didn't lose his head, too.

ME: *dumbfounded*.... You knew Thomas Boleyn? And Wolsey? *Grins*

Jackson: Yes, well, such is life.

ME: Well, tell me about how you became a vampire!


Jackson: When I was 23, around 1533, a crown was tossed onto the harlot's {Anne Boleyn's} head and she became Queen Consort. You do know what that means, right? Well, anyway, when Anne became Queen, shit really hit the fan at court. All sorts of things were going on! People were in and out, some for curiosity, some because they just despised her and wished for Catherine of Aragon to be given back her place on the throne. It was hard in those days to keep up with all the people in and out of the place. I was kept very, very busy.

One night, during the idiotic festivities to celebrate the brat's coronation, there was an awful fit going on in the kitchens. Maids going everywhere, kitchen help cursing...It was the most hilarious thing I'd ever seen. Someone had put a wooden block in the soup because one of the witches-and I use the term loosely...Really, she was more of a quack-had thought that the so called magical properties within it would kill off the idiot bitch on the throne. No one wanted the king to find out. They'd have all been put into the tower or sent home with a bad reputation. Whatever, right? Right.

Anyhow, I sneaked into the kitchen to see what the hell was going on in there and somehow in all the confusion, was snatched up from where I loomed in the hall and taken down a rather curious corridor.

ME: By who?

Jackson: If you're going to interrupt me, I'm going back to my coffin. *folds gigantic arms over chest*

ME: Okay, go on then. No more interruptions.

Jackson: George, of course. *sneers*

ME: George who?

Jackson: You said no more interruptions.

ME: Oh, right. Sorry. Go on.

Jackson: George Boleyn, then. And he was standing in the corridor with me by my collar and he just bit me right out of nowhere! Bastard that he was...I wasn't surprised. I always knew that he was a flamer. Everyone knew...

I don't suppose you have something to say about it...


ME: George Boleyn? Anne Boleyn's, uh, brother? He was a vampire?

Jackson: No, madam. He was just hungry...*Sneers sarcastically, then rolls his eyes* Of course he was a vampire, and a day walker to boot!

ME:  A daywalker? Then you can go out in the daylight?

Jackson: Nope. Genetically, I wasn't given that power. It's rare, you know. You're a writer, you're supposed to know this shit. Geez! What sort of writer are you?

ME: No need to be mean!

Jackson: Anyway, the bastard bit the shit outta me and gave me his blood and that was that.

ME: What happened next?

Jackson: Well, I was just getting to that part when you interrupted me. Again...

Anyhow, it just so happened that for the next bit, George taught me how to live as the undead. Then, he was charged with a ton of treason and they cut his miserable head off. Since a vampire cannot live after a beheading, I was on my own and George was dead. I never did learn who his maker was or how long he was a vampire, but I had my speculations.

I moved on with my life, though. I watched through a darkened corner of the Tower as Anne Boleyn lost her head, then left for elsewhere.

Elsewhere being Italy, where I found a few more like me allowed them to take me under their wing, so to speak. Well, something like that. Okay, more like I sponged off of them until I could earn my own money to finance my own charades. Ya know.

ME: Goodness, so what happened next to you?

Jackson: I returned to England in 1601 and hung around at court after I gained enough funds to float myself for a bit. I got back home just in time to watch Queen Bess flounder around a bit and die a few years later. I actually liked her. After that,I just poked around for about a century, hiding every few decades in another town, another city...

Before I knew it, it was 1847 and I was in Boston.

ME: Well, you certainly skipped a lot of years! *frowns*

Jackson: Well, some things are just none of your business, okay!

ME: Okay. So you're in Boston. What happens there?

Jackson: It snowed a lot. *Pauses*

My wife went on and on about this stupid new book, Wuthering Heights, that she just had to have and I remember spending many nights strolling around the city while she opted to stay home and read shit that made no sense to me at all.

ME: Wait, you had a wife?

Jackson: Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you. I got married in 1846. Her name was Catherine. Next subject.

ME: *clears throat* So, after that?

Jackson: I stayed in Boston after Catherine died for about another five years. After that, I moved along here and there, mostly staying close to sea port cities as I found it easier to dispose of bodies.

ME: Ewww!

Jackson: Oh, don't give me that! *rolls eyes*....it was either toss them in the sea or leave them in an alley to stink forever, and in those days, things stank enough!

ME: Ah. Good point. So what did you do for money? I'm sure the money you'd made in Italy had run out long ago.

Jackson:  *says matter of factly*  I was a gigolo.

ME: *blinks*

Jackson: What? It was fun and I made a lot of money and enjoyed it quite a bit until the Civil War ended...Then the men came back home and the women wanted their husbands again. Or each other's husbands. Whatever...I still found work, but it wasn't the same.

By the time that the twentieth century rolled around, I found other amusements. The coolest thing ever!

*slaps leg, laughs*....

Whenever they decided to outlaw boos, these crazy mortals were absolutely rabid for it. I had it all worked out to open my own place, run a speakeasy, you know? And they would come in there and buy all kinds of boos, which really helped my wallet, and then when they were so drunk that they couldn't hardly move without help, I'd pick one off while the others were out of it. One or two every night, sometimes three--I was a very happy eater back then. Was like taking candy from a baby.

ME: Are you serious? You took advantage of them like that? Oh, nevermind. Forgot I was talking to a vampire. *smirks*

Jackson: Well, some of them were willing.

ME: What then?

Jackson: Then we had a shit ton of world wars, and the men were gone again, so I went back to being a gigolo until 1968. I forgot the entire next decade. I remember things after 1978 or 79 maybe. I dunno....*looks confused*.

ME: Well, that's okay. Lots of people have forgotten that decade. So what did you do in the eighties?

Jackson: I'm not telling.

ME: But--Oh, nevermind. What did you do in the nineties then?

Jackson: I'm not telling you that, either. If I tell you, I'll have to kill you.

ME: Oooooookay. How about, this.What do you think about the Twilight vampires and how they sparkle?

Jackson: *Grins*....That book was the greatest thing to ever happen for vampires!

ME: Do what, now? What did you just say? Are you serious?

Jackson: Absolutely serious. Since that Meyer chit wrote all those idiotic fairy tale books about sparkling, fangless vampires, all the young ladies think vampires sparkle. That means that they wouldn't believe I was a vampire in a million years. Not even half those crazy goth chicks would think I was a vampire! I can sneak right up on them and rip out their necks before they can say Edward!

ME: Makes sense. But, what do you think about the books?

Jackson: They burn well. Make good doorstops. I suppose you want to know about the sparkling part? Well, I'll put it this way. If I ever saw a vampire sparkling in the sunlight, I'd assume that somewhere beneath his clothes he'd been rubbed down with glitter and it had embedded in his skin so that when he stood in the sunlight and burst into flames, he sparkled....

ME: *chokes on coffee*

Jackson: Well that wasn't very attractive.

ME: *rolls eyes* 

Jackson: So, tell me... What's your type?

ME: My, erm, what type?

Jackson: I'm guessing O Negative....

ME: Huh?

Jackson: *grins, scoots closer to me* Oh, you didn't really think I agreed to all this just so you could blog about a vampire, did you?

ME: *Takes deep breath*

Jackson: *grins a very handsome, toothy grin*

ME: Well, I, uh.....*scoots away a bit*

Jackson: *bites ME*........


ME: *body hits the floor*

Jackson: Well, I suppose the interview is over...Pity, that...

*tosses a wad of cash over my near drained body and tips his hat at me as he walks out the door into the night...*



2 comments:

  1. Hi. New follower here. I saw your note on the Vampire Fiction FB page.
    Very cool! I love these interviews. One of these days I'm going to have to do one as well with mine. I love the Twilight bits, especially when you choked on coffee. Hilarious!
    Good to meet you.

    -Jimmy

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  2. Thank you, James! Glad that you enjoyed it. Jackson Bennett is by far one of my favorite vampire characters and he's really such an ass that I have to love him ha ha! Thank you for following! I'll have more vampire content here soon, but my new novella, The Demon King, is almost ready to be released so I have to work on him for a while :)

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